"I won't be IGNORED!"

Remember that classic line from Glenn Close in "Fatal Attraction"? Any woman watching that scene could relate to that line. Even if you aren't a home-wrecking, man-stealing, psychopath, one thing ALL women can relate to is how much we HATE being ignored.

A good friend of mine told me something a while back that I'll never forget. She said, "Some people are miserable enough to go out of their way to make you feel left out and ignored." At the time I thought she was expressing the sentiment of someone who was extremely paranoid. But as time moved forward, I began to clearly see what she meant.

Ever get the feeling that someone is INTENTIONALLY ignoring you? You go out of your way to get to know them, only to be rebuffed with silence? You make yourself available to them repeatedly but get no response from them? Your first thought may be, "Oh they're just busy and will reach out when they have time." Except, you soon notice that they reach out to others pretty regularly...just not you. :-) Ever felt this way?

What does it mean? Maybe they already have enough friends, and just aren't interested in making anymore. Maybe they find your particular personality annoying. That's possible. Maybe they think you're being fake, because NO ONE can be THAT genuinely nice! Or maybe they are envious of you. You and your encouraging smiles actually remind them of how unhappy they are. Who knows!

That's the overall point I am getting to. Who knows, and who CARES? I don't think we should love people any less because they don't jump for joy when we come around. Maybe if we try to be more understanding of the fact that they are at a period in their life right now where they are just not that into you. They definitely have that right, and it should be respected. If we genuinely care about them, wouldn't we focus more on praying for them than analyzing why they aren't reacting to us a certain way in the flesh?

Sometimes being ignored is a good thing. Maybe it's not meant for you to be caught up in whatever drama they may have going on. And maybe it's meant for you to stay strong and far enough away from their situation to provide the best type of assistance possible...the fervent prayers of a strong believer. Being ignored doesn't seem so bad when you think of it this way, does it? :-)

New Beginnings

2008 has been some year. I spent the first few months of it trying to recover from the sudden, overwhelming loss of both my grandmother and my 10-year old dog Sheba. Later came the suggestion from my kids' pediatrician that I should have my son evaluated for a couple of potential developmental issues. So I spent the first half of the year extremely distracted. I wasn't able to function at work the way I had envisioned early fall of last year. I was on a roll back in Sept 2007, and figured I'd be at a certain point by Sept 2008 that would seriously catapult my career-path. However, I spent most of my time dealing with the heartbreaking agony of death and focused on ensuring the mental health and development of my children to the best of my ability. I have been emotionally exhausted overall. But the Lord has carried me through all of this, no doubt about that. I wouldn't even be able to type this, let alone function normally these days otherwise.



Tomorrow, I will be working from home, and Tuesday begins my son's first day of Pre-K in a new Christian school in our area. I will be praying for his continued health, safety, growth, development, and protection everyday of his life. His classroom will be on the same hall as 2nd and 3rd graders. He will be taking his lunch to school and eating in the cafeteria. He will be going to the library for quiet reading time! My little 4-year old baby boy!! My daughter just started a new school last Wednesday; I will continue praying the same blessings over her life. Both kids' schools are within minutes of our home, and will thus cut our daily commute time by an entire hour and a half!! I'm getting an hour and a half of my day back to spend with my family instead of sitting on the roads of Atlanta cursing out stupid non-driving morons and asking my kids to stop whining on our LONG drive home everyday! Thank God.

I feel like with these new opportunities comes the opportunity for growth in different areas of my life (family, job, church, friends). I will continue to pray over this and do the best I can to stay focused on the heart of God and live as a true example of His grace and love as much as possible. One thing we know for sure...tomorrow on Earth isn't promised to any of us, and I'm going to start living like it!!

Give with love...trust His love

I was REALLY craving cereal and milk last night. I've been eating very healthy over the past month, but I've been avoiding a lot of essential dairy food items that I love, namely milk. As most of you know, my family is living on one income while my husband completes law school. It's been going well financially, but every now and again we get down to the last few dollars and have to stretch them between pay periods. Yesterday was one of those days when I realized we had gotten to that point.

So I can't knock the cereal craving, and I hop in my truck and drive to Publix. I pull into the parking space and notice an older model pickup truck in a parking space across and to the right of mine. I sit there and primp for a few minutes with the car still running (yes, I primp even before I go into the store...sad). I notice that a man gets out of the passenger side of the aforementioned truck. After I turn off my truck, I glance over again and notice that he closes the door behind him and crosses his arms. He is wearing sunglasses and appears to be staring directly at me. He is who people that I know, both white and black, would see and immediately refer to as "redneck". His arms were covered in tattoos, his clothes and even the truck fit every stereotype, especially in my little town of Douglasville. I walk briskly out of the parking lot into Publix, setting the alarm on my truck as I walk.

I buy my milk and cereal and walk back out to the parking lot. The guy is still standing in front of his truck. I unlock my truck about 15 feet away from it, and I soon as I get to it I unlike the door, toss the bags in the seat, and jump in ready to crank up and roll. The guy starts walking in front of my truck waving at me and smiling. I'm a woman all by myself in a quiet parking lot, and for whatever reason I didn't feel threatened in the least. I get out of my truck and smile back and say, "Hi, what is it?" He explains that he is very embarrassed to have to ask me this, but he and his girlfriend have been driving on E for the past few miles and realize that they won't make it to their home without running out of gas. He jingled a couple of nickels and quarters in his hand and said that it was all they had. I said, "Oh okay, you need some money for gas?" as I checked my wallet and realized that I had NADA. He says that he would really appreciate it if I could help, and reemphasized how embarrassing this was for him. I assured him that he had nothing to be embarrassed about, and told him that I would be right back.

Now, I knew when I first arrived at Publix that I only had a couple of dollars to spend on the cereal and milk because our account is near depleted due to a bunch of unexpected expenses. But something in my heart couldn't leave that young man and his girlfriend in that parking lot without trying to do something. I went to the ATM machine outside of Publix and withdrew cash. You're forced to withdraw at least $20, so I went inside of the store and got change made. When I got back outside to the parking lot the couple was sitting inside of the truck. The young man got out as I approached, and I handed him $10. He told me that I was a lifesaver and was more gracious than any person I had ever met in that type of situation. My heart felt very full, and I smiled back waved at his girlfriend in the driver seat and said "Glad to help!". I wished them both well and jumped back in my truck ready to roll.
As I drove home, I said out loud to the Lord, "I know that I just gave away what amounts to pretty much all we had left to get through the next few days, but I trust you Lord." When I got home, I didn't have the heart to tell my husband, because I didn't want to stress him out.

This morning while lamenting over our bank account we realized that our debit card had been "double charged" this weekend. OUCH. We had even less than I thought. I cringed but just kept quiet, and said silently "Lord, I trust you!" I really meant it, too. As soon as I stepped foot into the CNN Center to work, I got a call from the daycare that my daughter was running a fever and had been inconsolable all morning. My hubby went to pick up our daughter, and I left work and drove straight to the store to get medicine. As I entered the store, I started trying to figure out how I was going to get the supplies to help my daughter's fever and cold with the few dollars I had left.

Then a light bulb went on. My company gave us gift cards last week for all of our hard work on the big relaunch task. Gift cards worth a very large amount. I had completely forgotten about that card!! All I could do was shout "Thank you, Lord!" as I bought medicines and other things for my daughter. Isn't He is SO faithful ALL of the time?! We've got plenty of money to get through this week and even a little extra. I don't even need to say anything else. I think that nothing else needs to be said except what a mighty God we serve!